2005: Plenty Of Lessons Learned
Wednesday - December 28, 2005
The other day my friend asked me, “How long do you think you can keep this up?”
“Keep what up?” I said. “The charade of The Young View?”
“What on earth are you talking about?” I asked.
“You’re not going to be ‘young’ forever, so how long do you think you can pull it off?” he said.
“OK, buddy, wait just a minute now,” I retorted. “I’m still young, only 29, so I can claim to be young at least another six years, I’d say. And my last name is still ‘Young!’”
This answer seemed to satisfy my friend’s curiosity and he started talking about something else ... I can’t remember what - probably football or something manly - but I wasn’t paying attention.
I was mulling over the possibility that one day I may not be young enough to express “The Young View” anymore.
After some deep thought I decided this: young, middle of the road or old, it doesn’t matter.
Though I might have to rename my weekly writings something different in a few years, the purpose of this column will still be the same: To write about things that matter in our personal and professional lives, to make you laugh or cry, to make you think, and to help you gain different perspectives on the things that matter most to your heart.
It’s life’s journey, and I hope we can travel it together.
My own journey this past year has been full of challenges - some have made me stronger, all have taught me important lessons.
Here’s some insight from 2005: Always have a plan B. I learned this one the hard way this week when my tape recorder failed during an interview for this week’s Newsmaker feature. My chicken-scratch handwritten notes were minimal help, so I had to rely on the power of my memory to write a good story. A very scary gamble.
Speak nicely to your woman. “You look regular” can never be counted as a compliment.
You can learn a lot from your dog: When you do something wrong, be remorseful right away. Express your love openly. Tomorrow, all is forgotten. Get a different perspective to tackle big problems. And finally, be clear about your life’s priorities, whatever they may be.
Take some time to listen to your significant other. Just 10 minutes can make or break your entire evening.
The casualties of a broken relationship are vast. Ending a long-term union often hurts more than just the couple involved. You get attached to family and friends and you miss everything that used to be your “former life.” Those memories can continue to break your heart over and over again.
Sometimes your best isn’t good enough. You can love someone with all of your heart and they won’t love you back. Or you can put in the work to get something you want and it doesn’t pan out. These things happen. But at least you can say that you gave it your all. And there’s a lot to be said for that.
It’s important to finish what you start. Yes, I’m still working on my master’s thesis.
It’s also important ... to stay well-hydrated (8 glasses a day!) and keep up on your tetanus shots.
Prepare kids for the “real world” of relationships by teaching them about it in school.
Men, your to-do list includes:
Get regular check-ups. Watch less TV. Learn to listen without interrupting. Intimacy before and after. And throw away old belongings.
Women, your to-do list includes: Do minor car repairs on your own. Less talking. Be more easy-going. Say what you mean, mean what you say. And stop asking his opinion on everything.
It’s nice to feel needed and useful. No matter what your age. The “Badger” helped my father feel useful again.
We all need that tell-it-like-it-is friend for those times in our lives when we don’t have the inner strength and we need to be saved from our own stupidity.
You can’t forget, but you can forgive. Say to yourself, “I’m tired of not trusting, of being worried and suspicious all the time.” Do it, and move on.
It’s also good to remember that no matter what your year has been like, there is always plenty to be grateful for. I’m grateful for my family; for Mr. Pono, the wiener dog; for my coworkers and my job. I’m also extremely grateful for my friends. I can’t say enough about them. We talk a lot. We laugh even more. We support each other so none of us has to face what is often a tough road, alone.
Now I’m ready for 2006. Happy New Year to you!
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