Driving Without A License
Wednesday - September 20, 2006
I recently celebrated my 48th birthday. Well, not celebrated exactly, more like tolerated. After all, what is there to look forward to as I inch closer to 50? Not that I take living for granted, but besides growing old with my wife and watching our kids live their own lives, there’s not much.
I really got a bite of the reality sandwich when I discovered that I had to renew my driver’s license. The last time I did that was six years and 30 pounds ago. I know that because on my old license the photo of me actually looked pretty good.
License photos tend to look more like mug shots, so I’m not so sure what I was so worried about. About two weeks before my birthday, my wife celebrated her “36th” birthday. She too had to renew her license and when she did, explained that they reused her old photo.
I thought that would be great, so when I went to renew my license, I looked liked I just rolled out of bed - after a weeklong coma. I went up to the licensing clerk, who was a very pleasant woman. She saw my name and questioned whether I was the same guy who wrote for MidWeek.
I then realized she was looking at the photo on my old license. We went on to the vision test and she asked me to read line five. “Z-E-P,” I started, when laughing, she interrupted me saying there are no letters on the vision test, just numbers. I squinted, refocused and managed to barely pass.
I was ready to pick up my new license and bounce out the door when they said I had to take a new photo. I guess they needed a legal, more accurate rendition of what I look like today. I want to know the name of whomever’s job it is to determine that.
I took the photo and, I swear to God, their camera broke. I had to wait around for a retake while they repaired and reset the camera. Before I left, I asked for a bigger print of my picture so that I could send it in to the people at Extreme Makeover. Hopefully, I’ll make it on the TV reality show before my next license renewal.
Ron’s WEBSITE OF THE WEEK
All kidding about growing old aside, Deborah Jackson of Eldercare Hawaii submitted their website, which looks to be a valuable resource for families and communities focused on the care of their elderly family and friends: www.EldercareHawaii.com
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