Final Fantasy
Wednesday - September 24, 2008
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I don’t have any secrets that I keep from my wife. At least, not today I don’t. I’m ashamed to say for the past month I have been lurking in the shadows of my home life in order to satisfy literally what I call an online addiction.
A typical night has me waiting until everyone goes to bed, and then I jump on my laptop computer in order to peruse my nightly fix in specific areas of the World Wide Web. I turn the volume up on the TV to muffle out the clacking of my keystrokes from being heard.
A couple of times I’ve had close calls where my wife would walk in on me. I’d slam the laptop shut or collapse the screen.
She would ask what I’m doing and my overly casual reply is usually, “Oh, just checking e-mail.” Keep in mind that my wife is not dumb, just trusting.
On the weekends it’s worse, as I pray for reasons my wife and daughter have to go out. I think about it at work and sometimes even when I’m in church. Like all things, eventually you get caught and my day of reckoning came the other night.
My wife confronted me, saying that I’ve been acting really funny the past few weeks. Panic started to set in and then the real interrogation ensued. She finally broke me and I confessed. That’s right, I’m in a fantasy football league.
It’s taken over where Texas Hold ‘em poker left off. I don’t know why it consumes me as, when you think about it, it’s not even real football. Still, there must be something to it, as it seems to be a billion-dollar enterprise thanks to us armchair quarterbacks.
Ask any fantasy football player on the kind of commitment it takes to have a winning team. From the draft to the constant analysis of stats, it’s rough.
My wife laughs because her brothers and nephews are also in fantasy football leagues, so she can commiserate with their spouses and girlfriends.
She told me it was cool if I wanted to play, just for me not to sneak around to do it. A feeling of relief came over me.
Thank goodness I can come out of this closet. Now I also don’t have to hide the TV cable bill that shows every time I buy a UH football game on Pay-Per-View.
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