Mum’s The Word
Wednesday - May 24, 2006
I must be the stupidest man on the planet. I say that because I never seem to learn from my mistakes. With the amount of mistakes that I make, you’d think that at least once I would benefit by the simple act of not repeating them.
Case in point - Mother’s Day. Now I have celebrated Mother’s Day with my mother probably since I was born, duh! That means I have 47 and a half years under my belt to know the “do’s and don’ts” of this sacred holiday.
Now that I’m married, my dilemma is threefold as I have to now be concerned about my mother, my mother-in-law and the mother of my children. That’s a lot of pressure, and certainly past Mother’s Day “celebrations” have brought me down to my knees.
I liken Mother’s Day to a test for all men. We’re being tested for our level of sincere appreciation for all that mothers do. There’s no doubt that like the commercial, what they do is priceless. In my mind, each and every mother should be bestowed sainthood.
Still, the test is about what you end up doing, and those Mother’s Day SAT scores better be up in the seven hundreds. It doesn’t help that as part of motherhood, all mothers will tell you this leading up to Mother’s Day, “Please don’t buy me anything or do anything special.”
Yeah, right. While I’m sure they’re totally sincere about it, I’m not about to take the chance and do nothing on Mother’s Day. This past Mother’s Day, however, I did something worse. My wife approached me and said what I felt was the obligatory, “Don’t get me anything” line.
I looked at her and as though I didn’t have a functioning brain, said, “Don’t worry, you’re not my mother.” Although I had already gotten her a gift from the kids and was in the throws of planning a nice family get-together, I just negated all that with six words.
I’m lucky because at the end of the day my wife loves me no matter how stupid I get. I only write about it here so that some other man can learn from my mistakes. Either that or they can do me a favor and remind me next year for Mother’s Day.
Ron’s WEBSITE OF THE WEEK
MidWeek managing editor, Terri Hefner, put me on to “43 things.” It’s a site where you list and share your 43 goals. It’s a lot cooler than it sounds: www.43things.com Terri does about a million things but she had the time to send me a website. Send your favorites to me at:
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